About Date Rapists

First, there is no external description which cannot contain rapists. That includes gender.

This is why it is critical that all criminal allegations of rape be investigated competently so that all relevant evidence gets properly collected.

An alleged rapist's shock can be genuine even if that person is guilty. Most rapists have their rationalizations down pat and in the case of date rape, that will include the belief that something made the rape qualify as consensual sex.

Many date rapists let themselves off the hook by favorably comparing their sexual violence to that of stranger rapists.

About Companions Of Rape Victims

If you are talking to a rape survivor who is not alone don't make any assumptions about those who are with that rape victim.

Friends, family and spiritual supporters can hold attitudes which can retraumatize the rape survivor or prevent that person from talking candidly.

If a teen was raped after running away from home or sneaking out, there may be issues within the family that you know nothing about. There could be overt abuse in the home or the parent might blame the child for rebelling and see rape as the natural result of the child's rebellion.

In rare cases, a family member could be forcing an underage rape victim to lie, possibly naming the rapist as a stranger or acquaintance when the rapist was someone in the family.

About Preventative Measures

Rape preventative measures need to be consistent and not based on assumptions about who will or won't commit a sex crime.

Some broad measures, like absolutely no touching between teachers and students, only make people feel safer and do nothing to help people learn appropriate boundaries.

Other measures, such as having a process for how to respond to or investigate allegations of rape or other forms of sexual abuse need to be in place even if an organization is sure that no allegation against anyone they know could possibly be true.

About the Meaning Of Unusual Behavior

Some unusual behavior can be either meaningful or meaningless when it comes to sexual violence. Ignoring potentially dangerous behavior such as someone who insists on getting your beverage for you so you cannot see the preparation can be risky.

It's okay to be careful and anyone who tries to get you to feel guilty for looking out for your own safety should be viewed with continued suspicion.

However, odd behavior and defensiveness are not proof that someone is a rapist.